PETER ROST: PHARMA MARKETING EXPERT WITNESS. AWP, MEDICAL DEVICE EXPERT.: I'm Lazy. And Snarky. Or so I'm told.
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PETER ROST: PHARMA MARKETING EXPERT WITNESS. AWP, MEDICAL DEVICE EXPERT.

Peter Rost, M.D., is a former Pfizer Marketing Vice President providing services as a medical device and drug expert witness and pharmaceutical marketing expert. Judge Sanders: "The court agrees with defendants' view that Dr. Rost is a very adept and seasoned expert witness." He is also the author of Emergency Surgery, The Whistleblower and Killer Drug. You can reach him on rostpeter (insert symbol) hotmail.com. Please read the terms of use agreement and privacy policy for this blog carefully.

I'm Lazy. And Snarky. Or so I'm told.

I mean, if I wasn't lazy, I wouldn't be using blogger to host my blog. I'd be doing typepad or set up my own thing. But I'm lazy. Mind you, not at work. As Pfizer well knows, I got superb grades from my superiors.

But when I go home, I'm not the same as at work. My wife can testify to that. If you ask her, I'm not only lazy; I'm one of the children in the house.

Sometimes I try to object, but then she points to the amount of time I spend on the computer instead of cleaning the house, and then I lose the discussion. It is sad that computer time is not counted as working time in our house.

Considering that I spend a lot of time writing a blog for people who don't want to buy my book, my wife thinks I'm on the fringe of lunacy (OK, don't get mad about that comment, this is what she said). In fact, when she learned that some of my blog readers hadn't read the book, I almost got my blogging privileges suspended. That was a really close call. Fortunately a couple of kind readers then inserted reviews on Amazon, (check the most recent reviews here) and I managed to stave off that vile threat.

So now I'm here again, secretly blogging away.

This blogging thing has led to a lot of self discovery. Such as the fact that a few readers have claimed they read my blog because of my snarky comments. The weird thing is I never saw myself as snarky. I didn't even know what that word meant. Nor does the Word spell checker. Actually, the word is so new to the U.S., and spreading so rapidly through the blogworld that PharmaMarketing did an entire post on that word called Snark Meter.

So I asked my wife if I was snarky. She just looked at me and then she said a couple of things I can't repeat because I don't use such words in my blog.

So there I had it, I realized that I was officially snarky. It was suggested I could move people to tears, using that trait. And I thought that if I could make Pfizer's lawyers cry, that would be a pretty cool thing. Almost like being superman and be able to fly.

And that's when it hit me. My blogging, snarkiness, and tendency to make fun of big companies that hire detectives to spy on me; all that isn't really a liability; it is a potential revenue stream.

I could probably, somehow, make money off being snarky. When I mentioned this to my wife she said something to the effect that "enough was enough." I think she meant I didn't have to further develop this talent.

But of course when my wife tells me not to do something it becomes almost irresistible.

And so, last week, I set off on a week of snarky writing. I kind of wanted to hone my skills. That shouldn't be surprising; imagine if you discovered you had a hidden talent, i.e., flying like superman—I'm sure you'd go off flying every day after work.

But that didn't work at all, because finally Moogirl took me to task, and gave me a spanking, and she sounded exactly like my wife. I mean that in a good way. But I wouldn't be surprised if the two of them had been talking. They have the same perspective.

So what is a snarky guy supposed to do?

Well, I figured I'd just write a post about being snarky. Like this one. Maybe it will get the snark out of my system for a few days . . .

Oh, one more thing. Even though my wife thinks I'm lazy, she complains that I work to much. Go figure.

8 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

As you know, sage wisdom (along with a LOT of crap) gets passed on through comment sections.

Here is one I found and stuck on my wall (sorry I can't credit properly):

"When you wake up in the morning, what is the one thing that you would do, if money was not the object, that makes your blood race, your heart jump out of your chest, and forces a stupid looking, uncontrollable grin on your face?

That's it, DO IT! The money will come, I promise."

You are a FANTASTIC 'cleaner', and I mean that in a good way. You get all jazzed up, talk about ROTFLMAO and seem to be more joyous when you are digging and dishing dirt on corrupt creeps.

Halle-fucking-lujuah!!!! THAT IS EXACTLY WHAT THIS COUNTRY NEEDS RIGHT NOW!!!

AND, you even got into it in a manner that shows you DO have integrity. And the antics of the corporate scramble ARE entertaining.

You know you have the skilz to pay the bilz, what makes your spirit sing?

ideas:
-reality show where you get cubicle residents to wear hidden cameras/mics to just record the idiocy at work
-To be very targeted in your whisteblower non-profit in helping others understand and take a stand for business ethics
-to pose as a_________ )(attorney, janitor, salesman) and enter corporations to expose something you've been tipped off on
-team up with Olberman, Moore (he did Clucky the Corporate Crime Fighting Chi cken on TV Nation) or others tryting to get the word out about health and info to the public
-get corporations to hire you to 'sniff out' corruption within
-get behind a corporate accountability reform program and start a group like the BBB where it becomes a point of pride for a business to belong to show they are honest.

I stand by my original idea of you and John Perkins and any other reformed corporate crony whisteblower donning some leotards and cape and REALLY make a name for yourself as the Whisteblowing Wonders.

BTW, I though of you when I heard a piece about a book called, 'Why Bad Ads Happen to Good Causes'.

10/12/2006  
Blogger Markbnj said...

OK. My take on why wives think that husbands that are blogging are both
Lazy AND working too much.

You're NOT doing housework. And more importantly, SHE doesn't read the blog.
(and neither does MY wife. Sigh)...

Markie Mark.

10/12/2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Dear Dr. Rost,

Besides the FANTASTIC ideas presented anonymously above (especially the 'point of pride' idea--a Rost Gold Star for corporate ethics that all Fortune 500's scramble to get year after year!), do help your life-partner and the Mother of your children around the house--without her having to ask. This will greatly add to the quality of your life in general.

;-)

10/12/2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

It just hit me...now i know why i keep coming back. It is like waiting for a train wreck that you know is coming...I gotta be here to see it. Doc, your wife is right, you are getting a little nuts, but hey...it just may be a lunatic i'm looking for. Keep on doing whatever the hell it is you are doing, it's entertaining in a snarky sort of way.

10/12/2006  
Blogger Peter Rost said...

These comments are absolutely fabulous, since they give me the opportunity to brag without inhibition.

Truth is I may do a bit more at home than I let on.

And since I don't want to upset anyone, (especially not my good looking female readers), I guess I'll have to admit that I do the whole outside the house yard and lawn mowing thing, the auto maintenance and cleaning tasks, the breakfast, wash, dress and drop little people off in the morning thing, then run an hour to give my wife a firm body, after which I take her to lunch to give her one-on-one attention, and later handle everything dealing with cleaning the dishes and kitchen thing, then do the play after dark with kids so she can relax thing, and finally we share the little people bed-time story telling thing . . . at which point we're both exhausted. Oh, and in between I also try to do a bit of work, the stuff that generates an income.

:))

10/12/2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Marry me!

10/12/2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

A poetic post. Is this a new side we're going to see more of?

10/12/2006  
Blogger Moogirl said...

When will you male-type people realize that doing the dishes is foreplay?

And laundry, well don't get me started on what can happen when you do the laundry!

PS. Your wife is a brilliant woman, tell her I'll call her back tomorrow...

10/12/2006  

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