Thursday, November 02, 2006

Hi Doc, it's me again.

Letter from a very pretty reader (name withheld):

To: Peter Rost <>
Subject: It'sme again, REDACTED
Date: Thu, 2 Nov 2006 10:48:46 -0800 (PST)

Hi Doc,

It’s me again. I thought this was a hoot, thought you might too

I finally broke down yesterday and went to the doctor. After three weeks I still have the flu. Now it’s progressed into pneumonia, which I knew going in, as I’ve been hospitalized for it before, several years ago (my aversion to doctors has been long standing lol).

Now this is a small town doctor, not my homeopathic doctor. I save him for stuff that matters. All I want are antibiotics.

So I go to check in, and on the glass check-in window is a hand written notice that says:

“Due to the high volume of patients, the Dr. is limited to the time he can spend with drug reps.

New times and dates: Mon, Tues, Wed, & Fri, from 8:45 – 11:30 and 1:45 – 4:00.

No reps on Thursday.

You are welcome to book a lunch to spend one on one time with the doctor.

Sorry for any inconvenience this may cause.”

Now, correct me if I’m wrong, but is my doctor actually limiting the time he can see drug reps to virtually any time the doors are open (except for lunches and Thursday of course)? What part of “limiting” does he not understand? And what’s with the “booking a lunch for some one on one time”??? How creepy is that?

I live in a small town (10,000) and this is the only doctor, although I’m only about 5 minutes away from the second largest city in the state. He’s in his early 40’s, very sweet, kind of shy, not at all the type I’d think would be swayed by “Denise, the Drug Rep” whore. Could he possibly be bombarded with so many drug reps that he has to post a sign?

So here’s my question: exactly what does my small town doctor get out of the deal, besides a few minutes of a pretty girl’s time? He gave me a bag of sample antibiotics and stated the following, “That’s about $150.00 in that bag, Happy Halloween”. Other than charging me an arm and a leg for the visit and a blood test, I don’t see what he gets out of the deal. He didn’t sell the medicine to me, he didn’t write a prescription. What do the drug reps get out of it if the doctor GIVES the medicine away? Or am I being used as a guinea pig and the doctor is waiting to see if the sample meds kill me before he actually writes a prescription?

Anyway, the whole thing was a trip. Perhaps sometime in the future, when you are having writers block and have nothing to post, you can explain to us lay people exactly how this system of drug rep-doctor-patient works.

The girl who would rather have pneumonia than a doctor’s appointment,

Doc reply:

Dear Reader. You're funny!

Actually, I think that, especially if this is a sweet, kind of shy guy, he probably simply loves the time with the reps.

Imagine him having a real life fantasy playing out every day except Thursday.

How many pretty patients does he see (except for you)?

None. After all, most patients are like cars. They break down when they get old and banged up.

How many attractive girls does the doc meet outside his office? Probably zero.

And here he has them lining up, offering gifts. And he can offer himself up for one-on-one for lunch.

You wonder what doctors think about when they meet a pretty woman? Watch the two videos below.

You wonder why he gave you a bag full of drugs for free? Because he could. And because you're pretty.


Kansas said...

Hey Doc,

Do the drug reps hit the hospitals too? How about pharmacies?

What other doctor related places DO they hit?

Anonymous said...

Moogirl, you've been taking too many photos, lately. BPO4N, Open Vault and few anonymous comments, along with Peter, revealed some big pharma MO's, that give answers to your charming questions: They are everywhere and in multiple numbers. There is no "medically" related stone that these people would leave unturned in their relentless persuit of sales and profits. They would hit a which doctor if one moves to USA and opens an office. And it would not take long either. Before he would unpac his magic stuff, there will be 5-10 reps from each big pharma at his door trying to see him or book appointments: for sales call, lunches, dinners, trips to faraway places, etc. etc.

Anonymous said...

You meant "witch" doctor. We already have many of them practicing their craft here called "witchcraft" and they are regularly dealing with big pharma reps. Some are home grown in fact. After all they have to get their "medicine" from somewhere. What better place than big pharma.If they do not have specifis medicine for the hurt the Wdoc treats, they will invent a new hurt to match their medicine's indication and ostensible effectiveness. Just watch their commercials.

Kansas said...

How utterly frightening. It’s enough to make me stop eating chocolate for breakfast...almost.

Anonymous said...

More info for Moogirl,but not to worry only half maybe frightening. The best chocolate and the best medicine comes from wonderful Switzerland. Lindorf, Neslie chocalates for instance are very good and good for you. LSD invented by SANDOZ Basel may also be good but one should stay with its cousin Sansert, also invented by Sandoz and sold by Novartis nowdays, in case of frightening Cluster headache. Moogirl, not to worry this type of headache only men get. To be fair to big pharma,thousands of meds are wonderful and useful if as everything else, used in moderation, as they say. Moderate sales figures are not an option for then, though.